Coaching Steve

‘Hello Steve, what question are you asking yourself today?’

‘Hi Dave. How am I going to get my team on board?’

‘Right, so, given that we have an hour, what needs to be different at the end of our session today?’

‘I want to leave with a bit of a strategy.’

‘How are we going to do this? What are our roles here?’

‘I’ll do the thinking, Dave, and I want you to support and challenge me.’

‘Okay, where shall we start?’

‘How about I just run through my team members and summarise where I think they’re at?’

‘Go on, then.’

‘Okay, so Chris, Luke and Sarah are great. They just get on with it, no hassle, and are right behind what we’re trying to do. Nathan is terrible. He’s so demanding of my time, and he sucks the life out of me and the team. I think I’m going to have to get rid of him.

‘Pete is okay, though constantly busy with his head in detail. John’s the same and Tony says yes to everything. I think he wants to help but seems constantly bent out of shape worrying about Nathan, so he doesn’t end up following through on much.

‘And Jayne, I don’t know where her head is at. She seems to be sitting on the fence watching and waiting to see if this plan works. It’s all a bit of tangle and I’m in the middle of it. Somehow, I need to see it clearly.’

‘How can you see it clearly Steve?’

‘Hmm, I don’t know Dave, what do you suggest? Wait, you’re not going to suggest anything, are you? Hang on, let me think about this. Well, if I could somehow map it out, separate the blockers from the can-doers, that might work. I’d be able to stand back and see it and decide what to do.’

‘Go on, then.’

‘Okay, I’m going to draw a table on the white board, list names and mark where I think they are at on a scale of blocking and making it happen.

‘Some of them are in between, like Tony, who wants to help but he’s not there yet, and Jayne isn’t blocking nor is she helping, she’s just watching.

‘Right, Dave, I think that’s my scale: Blocking, Watching, Helping and Making it happen. And making it happen means “onboard” to me. Let me draw this out. There, done!’

‘What are you noticing here, Steve?’

‘It’s Nathan and Jayne isn’t it? They need to get onboard or this isn’t going to work.’

‘What else?’

‘Well, actually, same with John, Pete and Tony. They want to help but never have the time, they’re always busy on “stuff”. They also need to get their priorities straight. But that’s for another day. It’s got to be Nathan and Jayne first.’

‘Steve, that’s a big sigh, and you’re looking down at your desk?’

‘I don’t want to look at it anymore.’

‘How come?’

‘I’m feeling really hacked off with Nathan. No, with myself. I recruited Nathan 18 months ago. He was a real bright spark, loads of energy and perfect for the role. And now I have him down as a blocker. What happened there? I’ve let this happen, haven’t I?’

‘Steve, who do you want to be as leader for your team?’

‘What do you mean Dave? That’s some bloody question that is.’

(Long silence, Steve looking up to the ceiling)

‘Right! I have 30 years of experience to give to my people. No, hang on, they don’t need that, they need me at my most inspirational best. These are tough times. I need to be honest about the challenges we face, though we also have some great opportunities and how I personally respond to both is what counts. Who I want to be is straight talking, honest and future facing and trusting that we have what it takes to be successful here. Who I want to be is there for my people, but not doing it for them.

‘Look Dave, I am going to lift myself up, open my door, wander around and listen and talk. I am going to free myself from this daily grind, close my laptop and be the leader I once was when I set this company up all those years ago. That’s me, the real me.’

‘Okay Steve, how are we doing against your objective for today?’

‘I’ve got it, Dave. I wanted a bit of a strategy for getting my people onboard.’

‘Great, Steve. What is it?’

‘Just as I say, I’m going to lift myself up, get myself out from behind my desk and phone and get amongst the team, not just as a one off but from now on. This is how I am going to be as a leader for my team.’

‘And what about Nathan?’

‘I think he’s going to be fine. He has what it takes. It’s not him, I’ve been the blocker here. He’s the first one I’m going to talk with. I’m going to find out what’s going on for him, ask him and listen to his concerns with the plan and whatever else. I’m sure he’ll be fine and if he’s not then he and I will work it out together.’

‘What else, Steve?’

‘No, that’s it, Dave. I’m happy. I think I’m done.’

‘What are you learning about yourself here, Steve?’

‘I lost my way, Dave, got bogged down in detail, meetings and responding to emails. That is not who I am. I have always been about the people and relationships. I’ve just realised that. When I dedicate myself to my people and our customers, the business works out. That’s my place here.’

‘How are you going to hold yourself to account here, Steve?’

‘Will you check up on me in a month, Dave?’

‘Is that coaching, Steve?’

‘I guess not. Actually, Dave, I am going to get myself a buddy and we’ll provide that support to each other. I’m thinking of Simon. He’s in a similar position to me. No, wait. I am going to ask Nathan!’

‘Steve, we have two minutes, how would you like to finish this session together, you and I?’

‘Dave, I can’t believe that’s an hour gone! That was great! Thanks for giving me space to work through this. I love it how you don’t tell me what to do, nor make suggestions or give advice. I worked this all out for me and I own it. Thanks, that was really useful.’

‘Thanks to you, Steve, great working with you.’